Ross Douthat says his reading of Big Love is different than mine. But I don’t see these two readings as particularly opposed. Before the Hawaii decision and the Defense of Marriage Act in the mid-1990s, the gay community was split between folks in favor of same-sex marriage and radicals who wanted to undermine marriage in society at large. The radicals especially objected to the two-partner standard. If we see Big Love as coming out of a more radical sensibility, the apparent contradiction between Douthat’s interpretation and mine is resolved.