Well, I said “Bring it on,” and readers did. The worst of many:

“Derb—If the algae in the care of your daughter evolves into a super intelligent mouse, you will be required to get some flowers for algae-non.

“On the other hand, if it evolves into a female human, in time it will require an algae-bra.

“Should it evolve into a form of life that resembles a human, even capable of speech, yet oddly enough incapable of thought or any spark of intelligence, get it a job working for algae-zeera or some other appropriate media outlet.

“If you and your family take it on a trip to the Alps, everyone must learn to sing “Al-gae-ree, al-gae-rah, al-gae-ree, al-gae-rah-hah- hah-hah” as part of a wanderlied.

“Finally:

“In the event that this algae is still around come December 25, no matter what form it is in, y’all can gather round to sing “Al-gae home, for Christmas”, sure to be a touching moment for all.

“HOPE THIS HLEPS!”

[Derb] Yes, Sir, that hlepped a lot. Thanks, too, to the many readers who suggested soothing lullabies for Kevin: “Algae seeing you,” “Waht’s it all about, Algae?” etc. etc. etc.