This would not be The Corner if there weren’t a Simpsons reference:

Homer: These fortunes are terrible. They’re supposed to predict stuff and ease you through times of doubt and sickness.
Manager: Well with all due respect sir I suppose you could come up with better fortunes?
Homer: You will be aroused by a shampoo commercial.
Manager: That’s not bad!
…
Manager: This gentleman here can write better fortunes than all of you put together. Show them!
Homer: Okay lets see, um… The price of stamps will climb ever higher….