Well, if it helps, when I first read this excerpt:

A Taunton father is outraged after his 8-year-old son was sent home from school and required to undergo a psychological evaluation after drawing a stick-figure picture of Jesus Christ on the cross.

I immediately wondered why an omnivorous reptomammal indigenous to the icy planet of Hoth would much care about his offspring drawing a stick-figure of Jesus.

Then I noticed the slightly different spelling.

(Note: This is one of the advantages of working from home. Kathryn can’t walk down the hall and hit me over the head with a rolled up newspaper after reading this post).

Update: From a reader:

Your post brings a whole new level of understanding to the exchange between
the rebel soldier and Han Solo:
“Your Taunton will never survive the night, sir!”
“Then I’ll see you in hell!”