Not to be disrespectful or anything, but I’m multitasking at the moment — watching the president on the small screen while spooling a recorded Scooby Doo movie from DVR to tape on the big screen. You know, it really helps to have Scooby and Shaggy goofing around in the background while the One is droning on and on in the foreground.

But I do keep expecting him to say something like, “Yeah, I would have gotten away with it, too, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids at your town halls!”