First, I do not do stupid pet tricks for I am neither stupid nor a pet (I am an emissary on detached leave to serve with humankind). Therefore any trick I do will by definition not be stupid. Second, I am not going to the fundraiser because I am a dog of the people. I do not condone the high prices you are charging to listen to the likes of Jonah. I would certainly attend an old-fashioned Texas barbecue with various and sundry meat products and an ample green space. But, alas, this is not in the cards (and I do not fly in cargo holds).