In a move likely to elicit the sympathy of parents and grown-ups everywhere, a city councilwoman in Baltimore has introduced a resolution calling for local youths to pull up their baggy pantaloons. Communities in other states have already approved similar measures, responding to the prison-garb-inspired fashion trend:

Holton says her resolution – which does not involve any penalties for offenders – is in direct response to the concerns among many older people in and around the city that baggy pants are a major problem, an indication of “moral decay” in society and “impede young people from garnering the respect they desire and deserve.” “There is a wide sentiment across lines of people in this city that have a problem with young people wearing these baggy, low-hanging pants. They’re offended by the fact that they have to look at their underwear,” Holton, reached on her cell phone yesterday, said. “And perception is reality. When they see young people out like this, there’s a heightened sense of, ‘Oh, they must be up to no good. They must be selling drugs. They must be a part of this violent crime that is plaguing the city.’ So it sends a very negative message.”

When I said her resolution would elicit sympathy, I didn’t mean to suggest that I thought it was the best use of government resources (though the time spent debating it will probably trade off with time spent concocting far more expensive and objectionable local ordinances). Still, anything that gets a Duke University professor to say something risible grabs my attention these days, I must admit:

Mark Anthony Neal, a professor of African and African American studies at Duke University, said it’s too easy for people – particularly those of an older generation – to be fearful of the fashions of the generation coming up behind them.
“Because we have a generation of adults now who are very fearful of hip-hop, it’s very easy for them to criminalize the behavior than to actually engage young folk,” Neal said. “No one wants anyone going to a job interview wearing baggy pants. But if they [young people] want to wear baggy pants with their friends or even to church, I don’t have a problem with that.
“I think it’s a problem where we have folks who are so willing, basically, to criminalize our youth without equipping them to make decisions on when it’s good to wear baggy pants and when it’s not good.”
Neal said disdain for the fashions of a younger generation is nothing new.
“I think this is young people just trying to express their individuality,” he said. “It’s not a new phenomenon. Young folks have done that throughout the years. A lot of these folks [who criticize baggy pants] probably wore bell-bottoms in the ’70s, or Afros, and their parents hated them.”

Uh-huh. Interesting history lesson. Now, kids, pull your [*@#$%] pants up.