Happy (Humanist) Holidays

It was with almost total skepticism that I read in my local newspaper that Santa Claus had become a secular humanist. When the story hit the TV news, however, I grew alarmed. At last, I phoned Santa at his North Pole workshop (he has an 800 number) and set up an appointment. I had to know the truth.

Next evening, promptly at 8 p.m., I heard the sound of a sled on the roof. A few seconds later—in the twinkling of an eye—the familiar figure of the jolly old gentleman emerged from my chimney.

SV

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S. L. Varnado

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It was with almost total skepticism that I read in my local newspaper that Santa Claus had become a secular humanist. When the story hit the TV news, however, I grew alarmed. At last, I phoned Santa at his North Pole workshop (he has an 800 number) and set up an appointment. I had to know the truth.

Next evening, promptly at 8 p.m., I heard the sound of a sled on the roof. A few seconds later—in the twinkling of an eye—the familiar figure of the jolly old gentleman emerged from my chimney.