The Streets Were Paved with Gold Diggers

While New York City’s corruption scandals were bubbling and bursting this past year, the city of Minneapolis, Minnesota, was shocked by the news that one of its own former candidates for the city council, George Belair, had been arrested. It was soon revealed that during his campaign he had bought $31 worth of Twinkies and coffee for a group of senior citizens— clearly a campaign violation. Mr. Belair surrendered at the police station and spent about eight and a half hours in custody, while a stunned citizenry speculated how many times in the past he might have bought Twinkies (or Cheese Nips or Hydrox or who knows what else?) for susceptible voters. Mr. Belair took off for Florida, leaving behind family members to tend his refrigerator and other political machines, and to deal with the charges in his absence: “It wasn’t just Twinkies,” said his granddaughter on the telephone recently. “He also gave them Ho-Hos.”

While Mr. Belair was out of town, New York City’s scandals continued apace. In court testimony, it was alleged that Lester Shafran, the former director of New York City’s Parking Violations Bureau, had received, as a consideration from just one sleazy government contractor, meals, vacations in Mexico, $1,800 worth of television and VCR equipment, a trip to Florida, a trip to Maryland for his nephew’s Bar Mitzvah, the videotaping of his daughter’s Bas Mitzvah, the renovation of his kitchen, gifts of lingerie, tickets to The Little Shop of Horrors, Cats, and La Cage aux Folles, an increasingly useful gold money clip, and a gold pin. Some New Yorkers were outraged. Who was that lingerie for, anyway?

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Peter Weber

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While New York City’s corruption scandals were bubbling and bursting this past year, the city of Minneapolis, Minnesota, was shocked by the news that one of its own former candidates for the city council, George Belair, had been arrested. It was soon revealed that during his campaign he had bought $31 worth of Twinkies and coffee for a group of senior citizens— clearly a campaign violation. Mr. Belair surrendered at the police station and spent about eight and a half hours in custody, while a stunned citizenry speculated how many times in the past he might have bought Twinkies (or Cheese Nips or Hydrox or who knows what else?) for susceptible voters. Mr. Belair took off for Florida, leaving behind family members to tend his refrigerator and other political machines, and to deal with the charges in his absence: “It wasn’t just Twinkies,” said his granddaughter on the telephone recently. “He also gave them Ho-Hos.”

While Mr. Belair was out of town, New York City’s scandals continued apace. In court testimony, it was alleged that Lester Shafran, the former director of New York City’s Parking Violations Bureau, had received, as a consideration from just one sleazy government contractor, meals, vacations in Mexico, $1,800 worth of television and VCR equipment, a trip to Florida, a trip to Maryland for his nephew’s Bar Mitzvah, the videotaping of his daughter’s Bas Mitzvah, the renovation of his kitchen, gifts of lingerie, tickets to The Little Shop of Horrors, Cats, and La Cage aux Folles, an increasingly useful gold money clip, and a gold pin. Some New Yorkers were outraged. Who was that lingerie for, anyway?