Books in Brief

When you are in other people’s houses, there are problems of etiquette. Only do it when the food is likely to be especially bad, for instance at weddings or other celebrations. Mutter something about “an allergy” and with luck they will not press you to reveal it’s an allergy to second-rate cooking.

But be prepared to put up with some abuse. After all, half the point of these picnics is to proselytize and teach the ignorant and lazy by example and contrast. Since the most ignorant and lazy about food are oddly those who can least afford such vices, younger readers might consider “Picnic Missions.” Simply select a lower-class housing development where the residents are wasting their—that is, usually our, tax-redistributed—money on dull, unhealthy but costly food. Drive there, preferably at night, switch on the inside lights of the car, and eat your five-course dinner. Choose your menus for economy as much as taste: potato and leek soup, fish risotto, cold jellied pig’s head, homemade bread, salad, fresh fruit. Do not be ostentatious: it is rude and foolhardy. For instance, silver napkin rings can give rise to all sorts of trouble.

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When you are in other people’s houses, there are problems of etiquette. Only do it when the food is likely to be especially bad, for instance at weddings or other celebrations. Mutter something about “an allergy” and with luck they will not press you to reveal it’s an allergy to second-rate cooking.

But be prepared to put up with some abuse. After all, half the point of these picnics is to proselytize and teach the ignorant and lazy by example and contrast. Since the most ignorant and lazy about food are oddly those who can least afford such vices, younger readers might consider “Picnic Missions.” Simply select a lower-class housing development where the residents are wasting their—that is, usually our, tax-redistributed—money on dull, unhealthy but costly food. Drive there, preferably at night, switch on the inside lights of the car, and eat your five-course dinner. Choose your menus for economy as much as taste: potato and leek soup, fish risotto, cold jellied pig’s head, homemade bread, salad, fresh fruit. Do not be ostentatious: it is rude and foolhardy. For instance, silver napkin rings can give rise to all sorts of trouble.