I got a hankering for Four Loko a couple nights ago, and I swear it was like Harold and Kumar Go to White Castle: I walked all over my neighborhood, trying every bodega I could find with no success. Eventually I ended up at a 7-Eleven that, while it lacked Four Loko, had a similar drink I’d never heard of: Blast, by the makers of Colt 45. I guess the government has almost won its war on trashy beverages that only I find tasty (judging by my wife’s grimace when she had a sip).

But of course, winning just isn’t good enough for these people:

Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley, along with 18 other Attorneys General, today called on Pabst Brewing Company to stop selling or alter its new malt drink beverage, Blast by Colt 45, because of its high alcohol content and marketing tactics. The drink, known as “binge-in-a-can,” offers the equivalent of five beers in one serving. The Attorneys General also are concerned that the product is being marketed and packaged in a way that targets underage youth.