I wonder if these weaponized chimps are anything to do with one of my favorite headlines of recent years:

US Police Force To Recruit Capuchin Monkey For ‘Intelligence’ Work If anyone from the Mesa, Arizona SWAT team is reading this, could you let us know how the Capuchin monkey worked out?

If the Capuchin monkey is reading this and you’re now heading up the SWAT team, could you let us know if it would be feasible to send a Capuchin monkey team into Senegal to infiltrate the weaponized chimps and find out what they’re planning?

If Patrick Fitzgerald is reading this, could you let us know whether it would be illegal to leak the name of a Capuchin monkey sent into Senegal under deep cover?