Some of my favorites from a list of (allegedly) real English subtitles to movies shown in Hong Kong:

*Greetings, large black person. Let us not forget to form a team up together and go into the country to inflict the pain of our karate feets on some ass of the giant lizard person. *The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold? *I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way. *Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep. *I got knife scars more than the number of your leg’s hair! *Yah-hah, evil spider woman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough examination.