A reader who is also an attorney has cast a cold legal eye on my beach encounter:

When you’ve been in criminal law 25 years, you can’t help seeing the world through that filter. The scenario I’m going to describe is ridiculous, but the law deals in many ridiculous things.
New York’s penal law includes larceny by extortion, which includes (PL 155.05[e][ix]) larceny by “Perform[ing] any other act which would not in itself materially benefit the actor but which is calculated to harm another person materially with respect to his health, safety, business, calling, career, financial condition, reputation or personal relationships.”
Again, it would be ridiculous to call your discussion attempted extortion, but I’d be wary of how I worded things, especially not knowing who the other side is. Cuomo’s old roommate? Spitzer’s new roommate?

I suppose my reader knows his business, but that looks like a heck of a stretch to me. My Black’s Law Dictionary defines “larceny” as: “The unlawful taking and carrying away of property of another with intent to appropriate it to use inconsistent with latter’s rights.” The essential element of the crime, adds Black, is “an actual or constructive taking away of the goods or property of another without the consent and against the will of the owner and with a felonious intent.” (My italics.)

This is New York, though — a/k/a Litigistan. I await with resignation the letter from their attorneys.