I just got a letter from the Inland Revenue (that’s the British taxman) — to be precise, from the Officer In Charge, Unit 353 Non-Residents, Bootle, Merseyside.

“Notice of determination of penalty for a late Tax Return for the tax year ended 5 April 2004.

“I did not receive your Tax Return by the due date so you are liable to a penalty.

“The penalty imposed on you under Section 93(2) of the Taxes Management Act 1970 is 100 pounds.”

Note: I have not lived, nor had paid employment, in the UK since late 1991.

I cannot tell you the exquisite pleasure it gives me to toss this letter into my waste bin.