An e-mail from Boise, Idaho:

OF COURSE that’s how it works to be a man, thought I don’t remember ever seeing spelled out so clearly. Part of our problem as a culture is our inability to abide by male “rock-yness”. But if you want a good marriage and healthy family the guy needs to be the rock. Being the rock sucks sometimes, so it’s nice if your wife appreciates and makes life a little softer where she can.
Analyzing “manliness” is like analyzing femininity or sex or love or God or Rock n’ Roll…you either get it or you don’t and more analysis doesn’t necessarily lead to more understanding.
A little about me, mid-40s, parents divorced when I was 6, college dropout, autodidact, IT professional, paleo-conservative, Lutheran (Missouri Synod), married 20 yrs, two kids.